Unwrap Your Day and Embrace Disappointments!

You never know what a day will bring you. We anticipate the new beginning of a day with optimism. Inevitably, unwanted surprises could be lurking in the day. One approach to the unsuspected, mimics the skills of opening a bad gift! What? Yes, you read that right. Read on.

At times, you might suspect that your young child may have to open a gift that is disappointing.  To save ourselves from embarrassment as the parent, we prepare our children for the moment. It might sound like this, "Now, if you open a present today and you can see that it is something that you would never use or will not fit you, what can you say and do?" We then go on to shape their responses and give them the awareness, tools and preparation to save US the parent from being embarrassed.  These skills include how to approach the disappointment without well.... just that, disappointment! You could say I have some parental experience with this.

My sweet, loving, well intended mom never did come close to mastering the art of gift giving. Her shopping looks a lot like this. She enters the store with no ideas, no sizes and no list. She sees a beautiful pair of shiny shoes on sale. Her eyes light up (she loves jewels and colors, they just draw her AND they're on sale!) and she says to herself "Ooh-la-la, Ally would like those (her 16 year old granddaughter)." She happily proceeds to buy them. Now, comes Christmas morning. Ally (my conservative, athletic, plain dressing niece) opens the size 5 shoes when she wears an 8 (but she wouldn't wear them anyway). The next hard part is the question, where did you get them (In secret hopes of a cash refund)? Bad question. Either she doesn't remember, they were on clearance, there is no receipt or most likely, all of the above. Basically, they are hers. She owns them! After many years, it became comical to see what surprises were lurking and everyone else's "surprises" too! When my kids were young, I always prepared them so they wouldn't be disappointed, I wouldn't be embarrassed if their reaction was poor and certainly I didn't want my well intended mom to feel bad (she always wanted to everyone to feel the same delight she felt when she saw them). This is where I tried to teach my children about paying attention to someone's intention and not the outcome. Mom's intention was always the best and sometimes she got lucky and it was the best gift ever!

How can this help us as adults to have better days? We need to prepare ourselves for the unwrapping of the gift of a new day. We never know what's inside but our preparation for the unexpected can help us embrace it lovingly.

• Remind yourself that today is a gift
• Be grateful no matter what's inside
• Prepare for the unexpected (Choose to see problems as simply challenges)
• Give yourself some fall back mantra's for disappointments (Could be worse! Personally, when something bad is happening, I start listing all the horrific things that someone else may be dealing with) When we do this, it somehow just lifts the heaviness right out of something and takes the power out of it.
• Learn to embrace whatever is...
• Insert humor into it if possible (this turns the disappointment into a good story or memory)

Believe it or not, happiness is a choice!

Most important! Just be prepared for the unexpected and embrace it! Have you been able to SAVE the day even with unexpected disappointments? Do you have tools or mantra's that will help us? Share a funny story! Please enter comments, stories or questions below.

This post is in reference to everyday difficulties and disappointments. Not necessarily tragedies.